Published on the Yahoo! Contributor Ntework
It's nine already and I only have one hour left to get ready. Suddenly nothing seems to fit, not even my unmistakable Phillip Lim little black dress. My wardrobe, which is truly a dressing room, feels empty despite the piles of clothes abounding on the shelves. When it comes to shoes it gets a lot worse as I can't stop thinking: "Are these heels going to make me look taller than him? Are my comfy flats too classy? Are these boots too kinky?".
This is what I call a true state of emergency or what I like to think of as the pre-date panic attack.
A first date is a little like your first day at work: you need to make an impression, but at the same time you don't want to reveal all of your qualities and skills. You would rather wait to show your strengths little by little when a specific situation requires them and will therefore make you memorable and able to climb that "success ladder".
Despite what many people may think regarding judging others on physical appearance, I am a strong defender of irrationality when it comes to social life and relationships. If you have ever tried browsing an online dating site you'll be surprised to find out how similar it is to online shopping: what draws the attention in the first place is the picture, the haircut, the looks…and then if you are happy with that first visual impact you will maybe read about one's personality traits and interests.
This is exactly why I always get nervous on a first date when I have to decide what to wear. My first piece of advice is to make sure to plan enough time before you go out: it will make you feel reassured and more confident about finding the perfect outfit within your messy wardrobe. Of course knowing where he will take you is all at your advantage, as this will avoid any stilettos incidents during a romantic walk in Regents Park.
In the same way, wearing your new amazing and colourful Christopher Kane's dress won't help when you will be sitting in front of a big screen for at least two hours. Common sense and feeling comfortable in your clothes is key. My experience taught me that no matter how much "sophistication" can be attractive, it can also become your worst enemy. On one occasion I thought wearing my beautiful YSL Tribtoo would be just perfect to add that super stylish little "something"; however I had totally neglected the fact that worn on a six feet woman they will soon make you look taller than him. Yes, basketball players are not the most common "species" out there and don't forget it, as all you may here on your date night might be: "God, you are so tall!". And yes you are and you know it, but there's no need for HIM to remind you every single minute.
Trying to impress a rock musician once happened to be a dramatic experience too. I was so proud of my new studded leather jacket and my new Crazy Pig skull ring that I pulled on the complete look. I just realized when he picked me up that playing the perfectly assorted couple wasn't cool. Because having both long hair was not enough and both wearing skulls and leather was too much. So be very careful of "total looks": adding details instead is key and remember that when it comes to Rock'n'Roll, Axl Rose, Mick Jagger, Steven Tyler, Alice Cooper are all men.
On this night though it is your chance to show how much of a woman you are, so opt for femininity instead which can subtly be achieved by playing with details and light makeup. If you usually feel comfortable in jeans and converse swap them over for your best skins and booties or simple black pumps. If you like dresses you can always rely on a black dress, but be careful about being too sexy on your first date: this night is the perfect chance to get to know him and you don't want to scream: "I want you now" too loud.
Remember that the most important thing is for you to feel at ease, for as much as clothes can make you look amazing and desirable, it is all about how you move and how confident you are. Don't put yourself in a difficult situation; choose an outfit that allows you to move comfortably without embarrassing you. What I love about being a woman is you have infinite opportunities to play on details: earrings, lipstick, scarves, clutches and these are your perfect chances to show your sense of style.
Be yourself and show it, this is my advice!
It's nine already and I only have one hour left to get ready. Suddenly nothing seems to fit, not even my unmistakable Phillip Lim little black dress. My wardrobe, which is truly a dressing room, feels empty despite the piles of clothes abounding on the shelves. When it comes to shoes it gets a lot worse as I can't stop thinking: "Are these heels going to make me look taller than him? Are my comfy flats too classy? Are these boots too kinky?".
This is what I call a true state of emergency or what I like to think of as the pre-date panic attack.
A first date is a little like your first day at work: you need to make an impression, but at the same time you don't want to reveal all of your qualities and skills. You would rather wait to show your strengths little by little when a specific situation requires them and will therefore make you memorable and able to climb that "success ladder".
Despite what many people may think regarding judging others on physical appearance, I am a strong defender of irrationality when it comes to social life and relationships. If you have ever tried browsing an online dating site you'll be surprised to find out how similar it is to online shopping: what draws the attention in the first place is the picture, the haircut, the looks…and then if you are happy with that first visual impact you will maybe read about one's personality traits and interests.
This is exactly why I always get nervous on a first date when I have to decide what to wear. My first piece of advice is to make sure to plan enough time before you go out: it will make you feel reassured and more confident about finding the perfect outfit within your messy wardrobe. Of course knowing where he will take you is all at your advantage, as this will avoid any stilettos incidents during a romantic walk in Regents Park.
In the same way, wearing your new amazing and colourful Christopher Kane's dress won't help when you will be sitting in front of a big screen for at least two hours. Common sense and feeling comfortable in your clothes is key. My experience taught me that no matter how much "sophistication" can be attractive, it can also become your worst enemy. On one occasion I thought wearing my beautiful YSL Tribtoo would be just perfect to add that super stylish little "something"; however I had totally neglected the fact that worn on a six feet woman they will soon make you look taller than him. Yes, basketball players are not the most common "species" out there and don't forget it, as all you may here on your date night might be: "God, you are so tall!". And yes you are and you know it, but there's no need for HIM to remind you every single minute.
Trying to impress a rock musician once happened to be a dramatic experience too. I was so proud of my new studded leather jacket and my new Crazy Pig skull ring that I pulled on the complete look. I just realized when he picked me up that playing the perfectly assorted couple wasn't cool. Because having both long hair was not enough and both wearing skulls and leather was too much. So be very careful of "total looks": adding details instead is key and remember that when it comes to Rock'n'Roll, Axl Rose, Mick Jagger, Steven Tyler, Alice Cooper are all men.
On this night though it is your chance to show how much of a woman you are, so opt for femininity instead which can subtly be achieved by playing with details and light makeup. If you usually feel comfortable in jeans and converse swap them over for your best skins and booties or simple black pumps. If you like dresses you can always rely on a black dress, but be careful about being too sexy on your first date: this night is the perfect chance to get to know him and you don't want to scream: "I want you now" too loud.
Remember that the most important thing is for you to feel at ease, for as much as clothes can make you look amazing and desirable, it is all about how you move and how confident you are. Don't put yourself in a difficult situation; choose an outfit that allows you to move comfortably without embarrassing you. What I love about being a woman is you have infinite opportunities to play on details: earrings, lipstick, scarves, clutches and these are your perfect chances to show your sense of style.
Be yourself and show it, this is my advice!
No comments:
Post a Comment